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The Feminine Is Longing To Be Seen and Heard and the Masculine Is Longing To Be Understood

By 23.07.2021July 26th, 2021No Comments

by Aaron Kleinerman

This is the major point of conflict inside of almost all arguments with men and women.

What happens when arguments happen between man and woman?
What happens when two people are fighting to just want to prove their point?

Currently, I am in the mountains of Bali writing a book for men. I am very excited to share it with the world when it is complete.

In one of the chapters, I am discussing and sharing examples around this vast conflict that exists throughout all of time.
So what is the solution?

Well, for what I notice inside of arguments with my beloved, I do my best to listen deeply and witness her without judgement, for when the feminine feels seen and heard, then safety arrives.
I let go of my need for her to understand me, and if after the argument, there is a moment where it can be tactfully brought back into conversation, then I do so.
But I also let go of it if it is necessary.

I often notice that a man’s ego gets hurt if he has not been understood. He wants so badly just for her to “get it.” When in fact in the letting go of this need, then a deeper understanding can actually land between the two of you.

So what arises for you in these dynamics?
Do you tend towards wanting to just be heard, or are you always seeking to be understood?